H Is H: September 19-24, 2005

Oh, Artie, Artie, Artie. Can you tell that these hamsters are bad news? Just look at them!

Actually, now that I look at this strip, there is something unsettling about the hamsters climbing around on their unconvincing humanoid transport. I can’t believe I fell for Muppet Man.

“Naive” should have little dots over it instead of a little line.

Just a little plot-advancing strip. Also an opportunity to practice drawing Artie’s expressions and body language, which this storyline was pretty useful for. Artie has a surprisingly expressive face when he’s human.

This is arguably the most reckless and poorly-thought-out thing Artie does in the entirety of Narbonic. In his defense, he doesn’t have a very clear idea of how money works.

I had a lot of trouble writing this strip and worried that the punchline wasn’t very Narbonic, somehow, but now that I’m looking at it, it’s pretty good. Or maybe I just want cupcakes.

Mike looks a lot like my drawings of Apple Butter Lad in my friend Rob’s comic Hell on Wheels. There are only so many ways I can draw glorpy plasma guys.

Man, drawing mechanical cyborg wings is hard.

This strip was inspired by the wrestling documentary Beyond the Mat, which I watched around this time, specifically all scenes involving Jake “The Snake” Roberts.

PROTIP: In wrestling parlance, “personal demons” means “meth.”

24 thoughts on “H Is H: September 19-24, 2005

  1. Well you’re both wrong. I’ve known since seventh grade P.E. that naive has a squiggle on it!

  2. Muppet Man! Since the movie only arrived in Britain on the 10th, and it was my birthday on Saturday, that’s when I saw it.

  3. (TUNE: “When You Believe”, Mariah Carey & Whitney Houston)

    The hamsters in the suit
    Abducted some of Madblood’s ‘bots …
    That explains the giant Foot
    Attacking us today!
    Although they may be cute,
    They’re harboring some evil thoughts!
    Laughing up their fuzzy sleeve
    When they hear Artie say …
    He’ll say …

    “Thank you for helping them!  They’re so na?ve!
    Those guys are trusting and innocent!
    Now my anxiety … you will relieve,
    Now that I know just where they went!
    Those guys are so na?ve!”

  4. Tuesday:

    Artie really doesn’t want to miss out on that mesmerising shapeshifter/transforming android battle happening just offstage.

  5. If Artie rides shotgun, that means the hamsters are driving.  And have a driver’s license.  And insurance.  Huh, wonder how “Flo from Progressive” would deal with the trenchcoat-and-paper-plate customer.

  6. And thus Artie finds himself at cross purposes with not only Lupin, but Dave… and ultimately the world.  What would have happened had Lupin gotten a solid strike in against the hamsters?

    Oh, who are we kidding.  Lupin knowingly sent a 12′ Foot to chase a swarm of normal-sized hamsters, as if to prove once and for all, that bigger isn’t always better.  Artie probably kept them from infesting and taking over Foot.

  7. You expect us to believe that?

    It’s good to know that Artie knows what na?vet? is, even if he can’t spell it. Although it would only need a dab of correction fluid…

  8. Given the design of the flying island, I wouldn’t be surprised if they really did end up spending it on chocalatey cupcakes. Weapons-grade chocalatey cupcakes.

  9. It’s funny how, after some years and many new media in one’s head, it’s possible to find a whole new unrelated funny meaning to a punchline.

    Ask Jeffrey about “weapons-grade cupcakes”, he’ll surely think exactly the same 😀

  10. Wednesday:

    I get the feeling he’s only doing this because he knows that they are Dana’s protégés. Maybe he feels that they are his estranged family, the last remnants of his own kind who are going back on the straight and narrow. What’s he to do with the money when the company he keeps includes one or more evil geniuses and a law major?

  11. (TUNE: “Caramelldansen”, Caramell)

    We came to crash the party, we made a fuss!
    We came to say to Artie, “You’re one of us!
    With your size,
    You can help us little guys!
    So if you leave the lab, it’ll be such fun!
    In back we’ve got a cab, you can ride shotgun!”
    He declined …
    Then he changed his mind!

    (oh no, he wouldn’t!)

    “Wait just a sec!
    Take this!” Artie hollers
    Say, what the heck?
    It’s a million dollars!
    Oh me, oh my!
    What a diff’rence this makes!
    We’re gonna buy
    Weapons-grade cupcakes!

    (nom nom nom, yum yum)
    (nom nom nom, yum yum)
    (nom nom nom, yum yum)
    (nom nom nom, yum yum)…

  12. (TUNE: “I Put A spell On You”, Screamin’ Jay Hawkins)

    I wanna sell your goo!
    Lovely slime!

    Give you a buck or two
    For your time
    (just a li’l time…)

    Folks acting funny,
    They’ll ignore you!
    Folks wanting money,
    They’ll implore you!

    I wanna sell your goo!
    Tastes like lime!

  13. Something about the “people inherently ignore weirdness” rule always bugged the hell out of me. Not that it doesn’t serve this comic well, but I dunno.

    • Could it be because it’s true of what passes for “reality” as well as webcomics?

      “Most people ignore the strange and unusual. I, myself, AM strange and unusual!” –misquote of Lydia Deetz in Beetlejuice, found on a bumper sticker.

  14. Friday:

    Personally, I think it’s great that Ruby’s cyborg wings are made of wood. It’s a touch of class and gentility that you wouldn’t expect in a military prototype.

  15. The lines on Ruby’s wings briefly made me think they were made of wood with metal rivets in between them, like she was a wooden robot. (Which would be awesome.)

  16. tune: “Winkin’, Blinkin’ and Nod,” The Simon Sisters, 1964 (Carly and Lucy Simon turned the poem into an exquisite lullaby: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MxPfsnPi78k)

    Zeta and Foot and Antonio
    Met at a ceremony
    They were giving out the Knipl Grants
    To genii 1, 2, 3

    A giant attacker I was meant to be
    But Madblood lacked for cash
    No articles or past tense have I
    All I can do is smash
    Adventure time for ANTONIO SMITH,
    And Zeta and Robot Foot

    The hamsters stole the Madblood bots
    And turned them into walking suits
    But Artie doesn’t know this, although
    He and they are in cahoots

    While pandemonium ensues
    Zeta lends Foot an ear
    Two crazy kids in a mixed up world,
    Together have naught to fear
    So of on a stomping romp they go
    Zeta and Foot are in love (Stomp! Stomp! Stomp!)
    Zeta and Foot are in love

  17. (TUNE: “Don’t Stand So Close To Me”, The Police)

    FOOT CRASHING, FOOT STOMPING,
    ALL HUMANS STARE IN SHOCK!
    BUT NOW IN … FOOT COCKPIT,
    COME ZETA, WANT TO TALK!
    GIRL ZETA ASK FOOT NOW
    THE STORY OF FOOT LIFE!
    GIRL LISTEN, FOOT TELLING
    OF ANGST AND INNER STRIFE!

    FOOT STOMP …
    FOOT STOMP ON …
    FOOT STOMP ON SQUASHY FOES!
    GET MESS …
    GET MESS BE- …
    GET MESS BETWEEN FOOT TOES!

  18. “FOOT FACE MANY PERSONAL DEMONS IN FOOT LIFE…”

    Plantar fasciitis, gout, tinea pedis (athlete’s foot), ingrown nails, splinters, broken glass, missile toe…

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