When you’re stealing Mallomars,
Don’t need other candy bars …
When you raid your boss’s desk,
She yells at you!

Center is marshmallow goo,
And they’re choc’late-covered, too!
What a dish!  They’re so delish,
They can’t be true!

    Hu-man taste,
    Sensing such ecstacy!
    I hear them calling me,
    “Come eat us, Artie!”

Though they make my tummy sick,
Wash them down with Nestle’s Quik!
When you’re eating Mallomars,
Your teeth … rot … through!

This might well be the only reference to that elephant-in-the-room, the Shapeshifter Baggage trope. Albeit a very oblique one.

(If this really is the secret of Artie’s ability to produce 6+ feet of humanity from less than a foot of rodentia, then all I can say is, Popeye he ain’t.)